Re: Hindi sex novel - Benaam! The Unnamed Truth
Posted: 28 May 2016 10:02
Ab muze neend aani mushkil thi. Aakhe band karna bhi dushwaar ho gaya tha. Jo hi main aakhe band karta to Neha ka chehra mere saamne aa jaata. Aur wo maine nahi samaz pa raha tha ki aisa aakhir ho kyu raha hain? Hum dono ko alag hue ab almost 5 months ho chuke the. To phir ye sapne ka kya matlab tha? aur ye aaj kyu aaya? Main in sab baato ke baare me sochne laga. Muze aisa mehsoos hone laga tha ki Mera aur Neha ka break up meri hi galti ki wajah se hua. Kehte hain jo hume sapno me dikhayi padta hian wo asal me hamare hi dimag me kahi kisi kone me chupa hota hain,jise medical term me 'subconcious mind' kehte hain. To kya ye sapna bhi bas mere hi dimag ki upaj hain ya kahi,deep-down mere dil me main Neha ke liye guilty feel karta hu? Kahi maine to use nahi ccod diya? Mera dil ye sawal baar baar puch raha tha. Magar dimag apne logic se kaam kar raha tha ki nahi, Cchoda Neha ne muze tha. Soyi wo thi mere dost ke saath. Duniya me mere sabse acche dost ke saath. ! Unn dono ne muze dhoka diya tha. Jinhe main apni jaan se bhi badhkar maanta tha aise do logo ne milke mera dil toda tha. There is no fucking reason that I have to feel guilty abt that. NO!!
Main apne andar chal rahi iss kashmakash se ladh raha tha. Taaki kisi tarah se muze shanti mile, main chain se so saku. Magar aaj ye possible nahi tha. Maine table par rakhe mobile me time dekha. 5:04 am. Abhi din shuru hi ho raha tha. Maine socha ki ab neend nahi ane waali to chalke running ko hi jaakar aata hu. Jism thak jaayga to ho sakta hain ki neend aa jaaye. Aisi umeed lekar main bed par se utha. Main jaanta tha ki aaj din bhar mera mood accha nahi rehne waala. To jitna kam ho sake dusre logo ke contact me aauga aur zyada tar apne hi room me rahuga aaj ke din. Main brush karne ke liye apne bedroom se baahar nikla. Jaate hue main Akanksha ke room ke saamne se pass hua. Dekha to uske room ki light ON thi. Muze laga ki agar ye jaagi hui hain aur agar isne muze dekh liya to subh subh dimag khaane lagegi. Isliye main dabe paav room se nikal kar sidha bathroom me gaya. Brush kiya, fresh hua aur room me se shoes utha kar,tshirt pehnte hue main door se baahar nikal gaya.
Subh subh taaza aur thandi hawa beh rahi thi. Maine socha ki kamse kam hawa aaj bhi sukun deti hain. Main dheere dheere running karne laga. Mere dimag me ab bhi wo sapna hi ghum raha tha. Main nahi jaanta tha ki jo kuch bhi ho raha hain wo sab kyu ho raha hain? Magar main itna zaroor jaanta tha ki maine kisi ko dhoka nahi diya aur na hi kisi ka dil kabhi dukhaya hain. Main ab tak apni ghar se almost 100 m ke distance pe aa gaya tha. Mere kadam jaise jaise raftaar pakad rahe the,mere khayaalo ki raftaar bhi badh rahi thi. Main raste par bhaag aage zaroor raha tha ki magar mere zehan me main waqt me peeche peeche jaa raha tha. Jaise main koyi movie ka scene dekh raha hu uss tarah se mere aakho ke saamne wo waakiyaa aa raha tha. Mera dhyaan raste par bilkul bhi nahi tha. Main bas bhaagte jaa raha tha. Aaj bhi muze yaad tha wo din. Wo manhoos din.
Main har roz ki tarah subh 8 baje uth kar ready hokar college jaane ke liye nikla. Jo hi maine bike start ki utne me Neha me muze ek call aaya;
Me: Hello?
"Hello! Samrat!"
Main zat se awaaz pehchaan gaya ki ye Neha ka call tha.
Me: Hey Sunshine..!Morning! Kya baat hain? aaj to subh subh hamare pyaar ko hamari yaad aa gayi? Bada accha jaane waala hain lagta hain din mera aaj.
Huhh! Sochta hu ki pata nahi kya soch kar maine wo shabd kahe the uss din.
Neha: Good Morning Samrat! Kaha hain abhi?
Neha ki awaaz zara dabi dabi si lag rahi thi. Muze laga shaayad subh subh hone ki wajah se madam abhi tak uthi nahi hain. Isliye aisi awaaz aa rahi hogi. Maine zyada dhyaan nahi diya.
Me: Main to abhi ghar se nikal raha hu. 20 min me practical hain. To jaldi se bhaag raha hu. tum abhi tak nahi ready hui? aaj college nahi tumhara?
Neha aur main alag alag college me the. Main engineering kar raha hu aur wo medical. Perfect combo. Doctor-Engineer! Ya atleast muze aisa lagta tha.
Me: Kuch kahogi? Aaj subh hi call kiya? mood kya hain?
Maine use cchedte hue hi kaha!
Neha: Ummm.. tum aaj college nahi gaye to chalega kya? muze milna tha, kuch zaroori baat karni hai.
Me: Kyu? kya hua Neha? Kaho naa.
Main bike start karke aage chalne laga. Already late ho chuka tha main isliye main bike chalate hue hi usse baat karne laga.
Neha: Nahi! Aise nahi. Milkar baat karni hain.
Muze kuch samaz nahi aa raha tha.
Me: Ptchh..ohho Shona. Kaho bhi! Aaj mera college jaana bohot zaroori hain. aaj mere project ka prsentation hain na! Aaj nahi jauga to maar khauga phir.
Kuch waqt tak muze Neha ki awaaz nahi aayi. aur phir;
Neha: Samrat, muze zaroorat hain tumhari. Please aa jao.
Ab muze tension aa raha tha.
Me: arre Neha, but batao to hua kya hain? Tum wajah bata nahi rahi aur baar baar milne ko keh rahi ho. Chalo thik hain! Main milne aa bhi jaata magar abhi important kaam hain muze. 1 baje ke baad hi free houga na Neha.
Neha: Kya koi wajah hona zaroori hain kya? Main milna chahti hu ye kya sufficient nahi hain ab tumhare liye Samrat?
Neha ki ghusse se bhari awaaz muze saaf sunai de rahi thi. Main samaz nahi paa raha tha ki ye sab ho kya raha hain aur subh subh Neha kyu bula rahi hain milne ke liye?
Me: Tum naraaz kyu ho rahi ho Neha? Its my work, I have to be there and present my project. Kya tum nahi chahti ki main accha score karu? Ye sab kya baate kar rahi ho tum Neha?
Neha: Abhi main bas itna chahti hu ki tum,isi waqt yaha mere saamne aa jao...... PLEASE!!
Neha ke uss "Please" ki aahat aaj tak mere kaan me gunjati hain. Uss ek shabd me bohot bheek thi. Maano Neha ki zindagi fasi ho usme.
Me: Neha? Please batao ki kya hua ha.......
Itna main keh paata utni waqt me muze mere college ke ek frnd ka call aaya;
Me: Neha, main tumhe 2 min me call karta hu. Muze ek urgent call aa raha hain college se. ok?
Neha ne koi jawaab nahi di.
Me: Neha kuch to kaho. oK?
Ab bhi kuch nahi aur isse pehle main aur kuch kehta Neha ne call cut kar diya aur mere frnd ki awaaz muze aane lagi. Main badi nirasha se;
Me: Hello!
"Arre? kaha hain tu? ab tak aaya nahi?"
Me: Ha Payal. bol
Payal: Abbe Bol ke Bacche.. Kab aa raha hain? Tune hi to hume yaha bulaya tha aa jaldi taaki hum presentation ki practise kar sake. Jaldi aa. Main aur Varun dono hain yaha par. We are waiting.
Me: Haa. Aa raha hu. On my way!
Itna keh kar maine call rakh diya aur turant Neha ko call kiya. Buzy! 2-3 baar try kiya, but still busy. Maine haar maanke phone rakh diya aur college ki or nikal pada. College kuch 10-12 km dur hoga mere ghar se. 20 min lagte hain atleast. Main college pahocha aur bike park karke apne department ki or badhne laga. Mere dimag me ab bhi Neha ka hi khayaal aa raha tha ki kya hua use? aisa kyu keh rahi thi? aur aisa kya ho sakta hain ki wo itni tadap rahi thi milne ke liye? In saare sawaalo ke jawab main apne aap me khojne laga ki tabhi;
"Oye hero?? Kitna time laga diya tune? Kabse wait kar rahe hain hum tera? Group leader na hota na beta tu to itna bhaav na deti tuze!"
Uss awaaz se main apni khayaalo ki duniya se baahar nikla.Maine saamne dekha. To Payal khadi thi. Paayal meri 2nd best frnd hain. Sabse pehla mera jigri Varun uske baad Payal. Aur Neha to jaan thi meri. Payal aur meri dosti kuch 1 saal pehle hi hui thi. Magar iss ek saal me hi wo meri bohot acchi dost ban gayi. Payal ka nature bada hi cool tha. Maine aaj tak Payal ko kabhi ghusse me nahi dekha. Ha. Ek baar dekha tha, jab hamare seniors me se ek bande ne uski or kuch ajeeb nazar se dekha tha. Pata nahi kyu aur kya dekha tha. Payal dikhti badi hi pyaari thi. Gora sa chehra. Badi badi kaali aakhe. Khargosh jaise 2 daat thode se aage. Mulyam aur baccho jaise uske gaal the aur bade hi ghane aur bohot hi soft se uske baal. Thode brownish color ke. Kapde bade ajeeb pehna karti thi haalaki wo. Hameha use humne aaj tak ek jeans,sport shoes aur alag alag sweat shirts me hi dekha hain. Dheele se kapde pehanti thi. Zara si dumbo dikhti thi uss wajah se. Ek hi ladki thi wo jise main dil se dost maanta tha. Uske baare me kabhi bhi mere dil me bure khayaal nahi aaye aur naa kabhi aayege.
Me: Huhh? Ha.. sorry traffic tha. to late ho gaya
Payal: Aisa bacchoo?? Traffic hone ki wajah se tera phone kaise buzy aane laga? Sidha sidha bol na kamine, ki Neha ke saath Guftagoo chal rahi thi.
Uske iss sawal ka mere paas jawab nahi tha kyoki main khud hi nahi jaanta tha ki wo sab kya tha jo Neha keh rahi thi. Hum baate karte karte department me stairs par jaake baith gaye.
Me: Haa. uska bhi call aaya tha.
Payal: Oye hoye mere Romeo!
Me: Bass kar yaar!
Payal: ha baba.. Bhadak mat! Chal abhi start karte hain ki kya aur kaise karna hain.
Me: Ya sure. Where is Varun?
Payal: Arre use koi urgent call aa gaya tha. Keh kar gaya ki hum dono continue kare. wo aa jaayega kuch der me.
Me: Shit yaar. Hum teeno ka hona bohot zaroori hain aaj.
Payal: Kyu? Tuze to pura design pata hain na. Tune hi to banaya hain. To agar Varun na bhi ho to kya hua? aur waise bhi aaj sirf presentation hain final demo nahi.
Me: Ha yaar. Maine hi banaya hain. magar wo Embedded circuits to Varun ke hain. Use hi configuration pata hain, muze nahi.
Payal: Yaar ye to gadbad ho gayi. Kamine ne muze aisa kuch nahi bataya.
Me: I'll call him.
Maine Payal se thoda dur hokar Varun ko call lagane laga. Ring jaati rahi magar wo phone nahi utha raha tha. Maine dobara se try kiya. 3 rings jaane ke baad usne call uthaya.
Varun: Hello?
Me: Abbe hello ke bacche bhenchod tu hain kaha? Tu jaanta hain na ki aaj presenation hain hamara? Aur tu hain kaha par? Aakar waapis gaya.
Varun: Ummm..wo.. wo..Samarat..wo..
Me: Abe chodu aage to bol kuch. wo wo.. kya laga rakha.? jaldi aa. 5 min me.
Varun: Thik hain. Aata hu.
Itna keh kar usne phone rakh diya.
Payal: Kya bola?
Me: Aa raha hain. Saala ye Varun na. Kabhi nahi sudhrega. Zaroor kisi ladki ke chakkar me hoga saala. Aane de use. Dekhege kamine ko.
Payal: Ha ha. Thik hain.Ab tu relax kar nd lets focus on the presentation. Maine saare Microprocessor nd IC's check kar liye hain. All done.
Me: Good! Code to kal tak thik chal raha to expect karta hu ki aaj code execute ho jaaye. Bass Ye varun aa jaaye. Presentation 15 min start hoga. Sun! hum seedha classroom me jaate. setup karte. Tab tak tuze fresh hona hain to hoja nd lets meet in 10 min.OK?
Payal:Cool!
Payal ne ek aakh sharaarati andaaz me maarte hue kaha.
Main apne andar chal rahi iss kashmakash se ladh raha tha. Taaki kisi tarah se muze shanti mile, main chain se so saku. Magar aaj ye possible nahi tha. Maine table par rakhe mobile me time dekha. 5:04 am. Abhi din shuru hi ho raha tha. Maine socha ki ab neend nahi ane waali to chalke running ko hi jaakar aata hu. Jism thak jaayga to ho sakta hain ki neend aa jaaye. Aisi umeed lekar main bed par se utha. Main jaanta tha ki aaj din bhar mera mood accha nahi rehne waala. To jitna kam ho sake dusre logo ke contact me aauga aur zyada tar apne hi room me rahuga aaj ke din. Main brush karne ke liye apne bedroom se baahar nikla. Jaate hue main Akanksha ke room ke saamne se pass hua. Dekha to uske room ki light ON thi. Muze laga ki agar ye jaagi hui hain aur agar isne muze dekh liya to subh subh dimag khaane lagegi. Isliye main dabe paav room se nikal kar sidha bathroom me gaya. Brush kiya, fresh hua aur room me se shoes utha kar,tshirt pehnte hue main door se baahar nikal gaya.
Subh subh taaza aur thandi hawa beh rahi thi. Maine socha ki kamse kam hawa aaj bhi sukun deti hain. Main dheere dheere running karne laga. Mere dimag me ab bhi wo sapna hi ghum raha tha. Main nahi jaanta tha ki jo kuch bhi ho raha hain wo sab kyu ho raha hain? Magar main itna zaroor jaanta tha ki maine kisi ko dhoka nahi diya aur na hi kisi ka dil kabhi dukhaya hain. Main ab tak apni ghar se almost 100 m ke distance pe aa gaya tha. Mere kadam jaise jaise raftaar pakad rahe the,mere khayaalo ki raftaar bhi badh rahi thi. Main raste par bhaag aage zaroor raha tha ki magar mere zehan me main waqt me peeche peeche jaa raha tha. Jaise main koyi movie ka scene dekh raha hu uss tarah se mere aakho ke saamne wo waakiyaa aa raha tha. Mera dhyaan raste par bilkul bhi nahi tha. Main bas bhaagte jaa raha tha. Aaj bhi muze yaad tha wo din. Wo manhoos din.
Main har roz ki tarah subh 8 baje uth kar ready hokar college jaane ke liye nikla. Jo hi maine bike start ki utne me Neha me muze ek call aaya;
Me: Hello?
"Hello! Samrat!"
Main zat se awaaz pehchaan gaya ki ye Neha ka call tha.
Me: Hey Sunshine..!Morning! Kya baat hain? aaj to subh subh hamare pyaar ko hamari yaad aa gayi? Bada accha jaane waala hain lagta hain din mera aaj.
Huhh! Sochta hu ki pata nahi kya soch kar maine wo shabd kahe the uss din.
Neha: Good Morning Samrat! Kaha hain abhi?
Neha ki awaaz zara dabi dabi si lag rahi thi. Muze laga shaayad subh subh hone ki wajah se madam abhi tak uthi nahi hain. Isliye aisi awaaz aa rahi hogi. Maine zyada dhyaan nahi diya.
Me: Main to abhi ghar se nikal raha hu. 20 min me practical hain. To jaldi se bhaag raha hu. tum abhi tak nahi ready hui? aaj college nahi tumhara?
Neha aur main alag alag college me the. Main engineering kar raha hu aur wo medical. Perfect combo. Doctor-Engineer! Ya atleast muze aisa lagta tha.
Me: Kuch kahogi? Aaj subh hi call kiya? mood kya hain?
Maine use cchedte hue hi kaha!
Neha: Ummm.. tum aaj college nahi gaye to chalega kya? muze milna tha, kuch zaroori baat karni hai.
Me: Kyu? kya hua Neha? Kaho naa.
Main bike start karke aage chalne laga. Already late ho chuka tha main isliye main bike chalate hue hi usse baat karne laga.
Neha: Nahi! Aise nahi. Milkar baat karni hain.
Muze kuch samaz nahi aa raha tha.
Me: Ptchh..ohho Shona. Kaho bhi! Aaj mera college jaana bohot zaroori hain. aaj mere project ka prsentation hain na! Aaj nahi jauga to maar khauga phir.
Kuch waqt tak muze Neha ki awaaz nahi aayi. aur phir;
Neha: Samrat, muze zaroorat hain tumhari. Please aa jao.
Ab muze tension aa raha tha.
Me: arre Neha, but batao to hua kya hain? Tum wajah bata nahi rahi aur baar baar milne ko keh rahi ho. Chalo thik hain! Main milne aa bhi jaata magar abhi important kaam hain muze. 1 baje ke baad hi free houga na Neha.
Neha: Kya koi wajah hona zaroori hain kya? Main milna chahti hu ye kya sufficient nahi hain ab tumhare liye Samrat?
Neha ki ghusse se bhari awaaz muze saaf sunai de rahi thi. Main samaz nahi paa raha tha ki ye sab ho kya raha hain aur subh subh Neha kyu bula rahi hain milne ke liye?
Me: Tum naraaz kyu ho rahi ho Neha? Its my work, I have to be there and present my project. Kya tum nahi chahti ki main accha score karu? Ye sab kya baate kar rahi ho tum Neha?
Neha: Abhi main bas itna chahti hu ki tum,isi waqt yaha mere saamne aa jao...... PLEASE!!
Neha ke uss "Please" ki aahat aaj tak mere kaan me gunjati hain. Uss ek shabd me bohot bheek thi. Maano Neha ki zindagi fasi ho usme.
Me: Neha? Please batao ki kya hua ha.......
Itna main keh paata utni waqt me muze mere college ke ek frnd ka call aaya;
Me: Neha, main tumhe 2 min me call karta hu. Muze ek urgent call aa raha hain college se. ok?
Neha ne koi jawaab nahi di.
Me: Neha kuch to kaho. oK?
Ab bhi kuch nahi aur isse pehle main aur kuch kehta Neha ne call cut kar diya aur mere frnd ki awaaz muze aane lagi. Main badi nirasha se;
Me: Hello!
"Arre? kaha hain tu? ab tak aaya nahi?"
Me: Ha Payal. bol
Payal: Abbe Bol ke Bacche.. Kab aa raha hain? Tune hi to hume yaha bulaya tha aa jaldi taaki hum presentation ki practise kar sake. Jaldi aa. Main aur Varun dono hain yaha par. We are waiting.
Me: Haa. Aa raha hu. On my way!
Itna keh kar maine call rakh diya aur turant Neha ko call kiya. Buzy! 2-3 baar try kiya, but still busy. Maine haar maanke phone rakh diya aur college ki or nikal pada. College kuch 10-12 km dur hoga mere ghar se. 20 min lagte hain atleast. Main college pahocha aur bike park karke apne department ki or badhne laga. Mere dimag me ab bhi Neha ka hi khayaal aa raha tha ki kya hua use? aisa kyu keh rahi thi? aur aisa kya ho sakta hain ki wo itni tadap rahi thi milne ke liye? In saare sawaalo ke jawab main apne aap me khojne laga ki tabhi;
"Oye hero?? Kitna time laga diya tune? Kabse wait kar rahe hain hum tera? Group leader na hota na beta tu to itna bhaav na deti tuze!"
Uss awaaz se main apni khayaalo ki duniya se baahar nikla.Maine saamne dekha. To Payal khadi thi. Paayal meri 2nd best frnd hain. Sabse pehla mera jigri Varun uske baad Payal. Aur Neha to jaan thi meri. Payal aur meri dosti kuch 1 saal pehle hi hui thi. Magar iss ek saal me hi wo meri bohot acchi dost ban gayi. Payal ka nature bada hi cool tha. Maine aaj tak Payal ko kabhi ghusse me nahi dekha. Ha. Ek baar dekha tha, jab hamare seniors me se ek bande ne uski or kuch ajeeb nazar se dekha tha. Pata nahi kyu aur kya dekha tha. Payal dikhti badi hi pyaari thi. Gora sa chehra. Badi badi kaali aakhe. Khargosh jaise 2 daat thode se aage. Mulyam aur baccho jaise uske gaal the aur bade hi ghane aur bohot hi soft se uske baal. Thode brownish color ke. Kapde bade ajeeb pehna karti thi haalaki wo. Hameha use humne aaj tak ek jeans,sport shoes aur alag alag sweat shirts me hi dekha hain. Dheele se kapde pehanti thi. Zara si dumbo dikhti thi uss wajah se. Ek hi ladki thi wo jise main dil se dost maanta tha. Uske baare me kabhi bhi mere dil me bure khayaal nahi aaye aur naa kabhi aayege.
Me: Huhh? Ha.. sorry traffic tha. to late ho gaya
Payal: Aisa bacchoo?? Traffic hone ki wajah se tera phone kaise buzy aane laga? Sidha sidha bol na kamine, ki Neha ke saath Guftagoo chal rahi thi.
Uske iss sawal ka mere paas jawab nahi tha kyoki main khud hi nahi jaanta tha ki wo sab kya tha jo Neha keh rahi thi. Hum baate karte karte department me stairs par jaake baith gaye.
Me: Haa. uska bhi call aaya tha.
Payal: Oye hoye mere Romeo!
Me: Bass kar yaar!
Payal: ha baba.. Bhadak mat! Chal abhi start karte hain ki kya aur kaise karna hain.
Me: Ya sure. Where is Varun?
Payal: Arre use koi urgent call aa gaya tha. Keh kar gaya ki hum dono continue kare. wo aa jaayega kuch der me.
Me: Shit yaar. Hum teeno ka hona bohot zaroori hain aaj.
Payal: Kyu? Tuze to pura design pata hain na. Tune hi to banaya hain. To agar Varun na bhi ho to kya hua? aur waise bhi aaj sirf presentation hain final demo nahi.
Me: Ha yaar. Maine hi banaya hain. magar wo Embedded circuits to Varun ke hain. Use hi configuration pata hain, muze nahi.
Payal: Yaar ye to gadbad ho gayi. Kamine ne muze aisa kuch nahi bataya.
Me: I'll call him.
Maine Payal se thoda dur hokar Varun ko call lagane laga. Ring jaati rahi magar wo phone nahi utha raha tha. Maine dobara se try kiya. 3 rings jaane ke baad usne call uthaya.
Varun: Hello?
Me: Abbe hello ke bacche bhenchod tu hain kaha? Tu jaanta hain na ki aaj presenation hain hamara? Aur tu hain kaha par? Aakar waapis gaya.
Varun: Ummm..wo.. wo..Samarat..wo..
Me: Abe chodu aage to bol kuch. wo wo.. kya laga rakha.? jaldi aa. 5 min me.
Varun: Thik hain. Aata hu.
Itna keh kar usne phone rakh diya.
Payal: Kya bola?
Me: Aa raha hain. Saala ye Varun na. Kabhi nahi sudhrega. Zaroor kisi ladki ke chakkar me hoga saala. Aane de use. Dekhege kamine ko.
Payal: Ha ha. Thik hain.Ab tu relax kar nd lets focus on the presentation. Maine saare Microprocessor nd IC's check kar liye hain. All done.
Me: Good! Code to kal tak thik chal raha to expect karta hu ki aaj code execute ho jaaye. Bass Ye varun aa jaaye. Presentation 15 min start hoga. Sun! hum seedha classroom me jaate. setup karte. Tab tak tuze fresh hona hain to hoja nd lets meet in 10 min.OK?
Payal:Cool!
Payal ne ek aakh sharaarati andaaz me maarte hue kaha.