A Howl In The Night - Romance, thriller, paranormal

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Fuck_Me
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Re: A Howl In The Night - Why Does Everything Have to Be So

Unread post by Fuck_Me » 09 Jan 2016 16:22

Why Does Everything Have to Be So Complicated?


Even as his warm, strangely familiar fingers dance over my skin, I feel no discomfort. Relaxed breaths brush against the back of my neck, somehow sweeping away all alarm. I feel an alien desire to lay here forever in this enchanting embrace.

Am I going crazy?

Fighting the strong urge to once again close my eyes, I jolt upright. Suddenly losing my balance, I slip off the bed, tumbling towards the ground. With a loud crash I bang my head against the cold stone floor, a slight wave of pain sweeping through my bones.

There is silence for a few seconds, then a voice. “Mona?” For some reason, the word sends shivers through my spine with its irresistibility. The light by the bed switches on as fingertips woozily grasp it, filling the room with brightness. A head appears over the side of the bed and I nearly go into a self-cataclysmic shock.

It is like I am falling under a deep spell, mesmerized by the striking beauty of his features. His hair is a golden-red, chaotic strands springing in every direction. Skin as clear as crystal holds a masterful pair of lips and a small nose, slightly tanned by the warmth of the sun. However, his beautiful, incredibly large brown eyes are what keep me spellbound. They sparkle slightly as he surveys me, confusion plainly showing in his features.

I find myself unable to move, frozen to the core. “Mona?” he repeats, a dizzy smile appearing on his face. And what an attractive smile that is.

His grin suddenly vanishes as he casts a glance at his hand, an expression of horror soon replacing it. “Oh no…” he groans as if in pain, “I ruined it now.” His head retreats from view, although his hand reaches to help me up.

“Who are you?” I try to be rough and forceful with my question, but I can’t as soon as I catch sight of those hypnotizing chocolate eyes. All my anger evaporates, leaving me completely defenseless as I stand up across from him. Those eyes remind me of my father.

Instantly I notice his bare chest, rippled with muscles. He sits up against the pillow, his head in his hands. “I didn’t mean for this to happen,” he sighs apologetically, glancing at me cautiously.

“For what to happen?” I take a look at the floor, suddenly embarrassed by the thoughts I am having.

“For this,” he waves his hand at both of us, “for you to see me in this way.”

I just stare at him, waiting for answers.

“I’m sorry,” his eyes crinkle adorably; “this must be a shock for you. I let myself get out of control.” Newfound alarm races through my blood, my mind racing to new conclusions. Glancing at my rumpled clothes, I suddenly realize that I never changed from last night. Surely this attractive man didn’t… do anything to me.

“Crap, I must have shifted in the middle of the night,” he mutters darkly to himself, cringing as he looks once more at his human hands. Within a flash, clothes materialize on his skin, making me blink several times.

“Why do you seem so familiar to me?” I ask him finally, and he pauses.

“You might want to sit down,” he recommends, and I slowly obey him, suspicion racing through me. Raising his gaze to mine, he reluctantly holds out his hand.

“Hello, Mona. To you, my name is Scotty.”

All consciousness escapes me as true shock overwhelms my being.



* * *



“Please, Mona, wake up. I’m sorry that I upset you.” A hand strokes my long red hair. “Please wake up,” he begs, his voice cutting through my empty thoughts. As my eyes slide open, one lone message enters my mind.

Scotty is a man. A very, very, very handsome man.

For some reason, I can’t make any sense out of that statement.

“I must be dreaming,” I woozily whisper, “you can’t be Scotty. You can’t.”

“But I am,” he whispers back, grasping my fingers and holding them tightly. "Here, my name is Griffin, but you can call me any name you want to."

His hand travels to my side, and I jump a little bit as he touches the mark near my hip. The strange thing about all this is that it feels completely natural to me. For him to be here. For us to be like this.

"I missed you so much, Mona," he smiles, a beautiful expression that leaves me spellbound, "it took every ounce of my strength to not shift into this form when I saw you yesterday. I thought I would never see you again. I was still trying to forget you. But then it all came back when I saw your face."

He leans towards me, and before I can react a tingle spreads throughout my entire body as his lips brush against my mark. I scoot away as soon as I realize what he did, a blush creeping upon my cheeks. "This is too much," I try to explain when he looks at me with questioning eyes, "this is too much for one day. I feel like my head is going to explode."

My head is not the only thing that is about to explode. My heart is as well, nearly bursting after the kiss he gave. He seems to sense this, crawling across the bed to me. "Now we can finally act like mates. I have waited so long for this... for you." He takes my arm and gently runs kisses up and down it. Shock temporarily overwhelms me as he pins me down, kissing my neck. He stops for a second, inches away from my mouth, as if he expects me to reach up and kiss him back.

"Scotty... uh, Griffin... don't you think this is a little fast?" I ask him, a little scared by his expression and behavior. He just looks at me, clueless.

"Fast? What do you mean by that?" he asks, his brown eyes creasing in confusion. "Do you not feel the attraction as well? We are mates, Mona."

"No, it is just... I'm a little conflicted right now." I sit up, leaning against the back of the bed. "I don't really know anything any more. I feel the attraction too. I mean, it would be impossible not to feel it. But it almost feels like there is something missing."

What is that missing quality? With Xavier, I don't feel quite like this, though the same attraction exists.

"Mona... that attraction is what binds us together. It is the eternal bond released by our werewolf forms... or dog forms."

"G-griffin," I stutter, "is that why you have brown eyes? You are a crossbreed?"

"Yes," he looks away, shame in his features. "I know I'm not deserving of you."

"At least you can shift," I complain, snorting then laughing to try and cover it up. "I don't even know if I have a werewolf form."

He suddenly grows stiff. "What?" he asks.

"I'm not a full werewolf," I explain, "I was originally meant to be converted to a Spier. However, throughout the conversion something went wrong, and apparently my conversion had failed. I was going to die. But Xavier came and gave me a few drops of his blood, and somehow I survived."

He remains motionless, thinking hard. "So you show the symptoms of both supernatural species?"

"Well, I changed in appearance, and my reflexes and strength improved. But I haven't shown any Spier abilities, besides the fact that I can see the shifters and heal the possessed."

"So you can't make a Spirit Spear," he said worriedly, "for any other person, that would be normal, but for you, that's very bad news. And what was the other thing you said you could-"

"Am I really going to die here?" I ask, touching his hand softly. He leans closer, kissing me on the forehead. Us being like this... it feels so comfortable and uncomfortable at the same time. I feel like a traitor.

"Not if I can help it," his kisses deepen, dancing across my skin. "But you will probably be removed from Pack 101, and they will be either exiled or terminated."

"What?! No, please, Griffin, don't let them," I beg, staring at him.

"There's not much I can do about that," he said softly, "it will be a stretch for me even to save you."

I think of their faces; Yi, Jake, Ray, Wes, and... Xavier. They sacrificed everything to save me. I was so important to them. How could I let them down like this?

How could I let... him down?

"Please," I say, pulling away my arm, "I can't right now."

"Why?" His adorable eyes search my soul. After I say nothing in response, he resumes his previous action, passion burning in his expression.

"Please!" I squeal as he continues, "Xavier wouldn't like-"

"What?" he asks angrily, stopping entirely. "Xavier? He's the other one who marked you, right? Who cares what he thinks? You belong to me."

I am frozen, considering my own feelings. Why did I say that? I suppose it was because I felt like this wasn't right. Like I was betraying Xavier. But am I really betraying him when he was the second one to mark me? Where should my allegiance lie?

"I was serious before," I urgently beg him, "I need some time to think before I go into brain overload. Please forgive me."

"I mean, I will always forgive you," Griffin replied, leaning back and lying on the edge of the bed, "but I am... angry. This is a strange feeling. It is like fire is choking me alive."

He looks at me with a inexplicable expression. "You should forget about him, Mona. He won't last long here. None of them will."

I bury myself under the covers, trying to escape the burning reality. I may not even see them again, and that is a hard thing to accept. This is too much to take in. Why does the fact that I might not see Xavier hurt so much?

When I finally recover, I slowly sit up. The first thing I notice is that Griffin is there, sleeping on the side of the bed in his dog form. His personality as a human is so similar to his dog personality. He is earnest and persistent, passionate and loyal. My mind flashes back to the time when we were inseparable. That time seems so far in the past, but it was a time of incredible happiness.

Griffin lifts his head, and I find that in this form I can't call him anything but Scotty. "Scotty, could you bring me to the rest of the pack?" I ask him softly. He shakes his head. "Could.. you try to save them?" I beg him, growing desperate. Scotty looks at me, then meltingly nods in response.

We sit there for a minute, then Scotty travels over to my side. He places a paw right above my chest, staring with unblinking eyes. This moment of seriousness passes, and he pounces on me, licking my entire face. I begin to laugh.

"Stop... stop.... STOP!!!" I yell as he covers my face in sticky saliva. He backs off, running to the door. I smile as he somehow manages to paw the door open, walking outside into the hallway. The happiness in the room vanishes, however, when the door bangs to a shut. Suddenly my previously desolate state of being returns, and I feel the urge to cry.

Somehow, the thought that I may survive this whole ordeal at the cost of my pack's deaths makes me so depressed. I might as well just die with them, with the number of times Xavier has saved me from certain death. I don't deserve to live any more than he does.

And there is also the fact that he is convinced that I hate him. The way he apologized to me last night displayed that. I want to explain to him before it is too late that I am not mad at him. Even now, it makes me hurt so much. I really don't understand myself anymore.

I lay on the bed, drifting into nothingness within the next few minutes.



* * *



During my time alone in my room, I try to create a spirit spear. Lying down on the floor, I close my eyes and try to imagine one. To imagine anything.

Although it has gotten easier to meditate, nothing happens even after hours of concentration. My eyes grow bloodshot and my body gets frenzied with anticipation. When is something finally going to happen? With every minute I am getting closer and closer to possible elimination by the council. No one has come to see me for two days, and the desperate nature of this whole situation is really starting to hit me. The horror of it at first was offset by the reappearance of Scotty, but now the fact that he's a freakin' man just adds more peculiarity to these circumstances. I have gotten sick of trying to figure this whole thing out. It's either I develop my skills, or I die. Unless I get a really good lawyer or something.

I haven't gotten any visions either, which is rather strange. I used to get them once every few days, but it has been almost a week since my last one. Only a few glimpses of this unknown world have skittered across my mind; most of dark forests, villages, and vast oceans. In all the scenes the same emotion appears—emptiness—which washes over the entire area like a flood. Not a single person is to be seen, not a sound to be heard. It leads me to wonder whether all of these glimpses and visions are just figments of my imagination, augmenting my deepest fears of becoming utterly alone.

For it is now a legitimate fear of mine, creeping upon me until it is impossible to ignore or avoid, making its timeless mark upon my form. Having met such crazy people, and having my life impacted in such a way really has affected me for the better or worse, depending on how I look at it. On one hand, I am now more vulnerable than I would like to be; I can now be hurt in ways that I couldn't before. On the other hand, however, I have been introduced to this warm feeling that I almost didn't know existed. It feels now like I am alive, and before like I wasn't living a true life. It makes me laugh to think now that the werewolves have brought me to death, then back to life.

But obviously now I can't fit in anywhere, which is why it is so important that I learn to create a spirit spear. I'm not a werewolf, Spier, or human being. I can heal the possessed but lack the basic abilities of any supernatural creature. I look the part, but I can't assimilate into any of those societies at this point.

Taking a pen from the desk beside me, I sit down and stare at a blank piece of paper. Laughingly I remember an aphorism and modify it to describe my situation perfectly. "Jack of all races," I whisper as I write, "master of none." Honestly, the council could kill me just for the fact that I'm an oddity.

Once I think about it, that's really all I ever was, even as a human. A laughingstock, caged in fear and criticism. But does being an oddity really warrant such chains?

I realize that I have been straying from the point, and try to focus on the matter at hand, which seems to be saving my sorry butt. Flipping over the page, I try to brainstorm ways to prove that I am not a werewolf and therefore undeserving of the punishments they wish to give. Any tests of strength would not work because the council would think I was merely holding back on my power. Demonstrations of my Spier abilities would clearly be impossible unless a possessed man or woman popped out of nowhere, which would be...

Hey, that's not a half-bad idea. I write it down on my piece of paper and label it "Game Plan". That's really all the proof I have that's in my favor, and though it's a long-shot, its also a possibly redeeming move.

I settle on the floor, having put my piece of paper aside. Casting my eyes to the ceiling, I attempt to calm down and enter relaxation mode. As I predicted, it is pretty much impossible.

In spite of my nerves I eventually close my eyes, laying on the cold stone floor with my stomach to the ceiling. I take deep breaths, breathing in and out...

My heart jumps a million miles in the air as a key clicks in the lock. Oh crap. They're here.

Please not now!

The door swings open to reveal two armed guards, both staring at my strange position on the floor. Blushing, I scramble to my feet.

"The council has summoned you," the tall guard says, his brown hair covered by a strange hat made of metal. The other guard is short and stocky, with bright orange hair that lights up the entire room.

"I suppose I can't refuse to go," I laugh shakily, which reveals my inner nervousness as it escalates at a mile a minute. They shake their head in unison. I check my appearance in the mirror. I'm not dressed up or anything, but I feel that my clothes look half-way decent. And its not like I need makeup... which always makes me feel weird because I never looked at myself with satisfaction before my conversion.

I follow the tall guard out of the room, while the short one trails behind. With each step my heart thumps faster, getting louder and louder until it is the only thing I hear. The short guard, though remaining silent, touches my back once. Through that touch I can feel his laughter. I didn't know my heart was that loud.

Oh well.

The tall guard leads me to these double doors that stretch almost twenty feet in height, inscribed with designs along the sides. Both of the guards stand on either side of me, swinging the doors open slowly. They look heavy; I wonder how they do it. Probably with their super strength that I lack.

The room is not as grandiose as I thought it was going to be, but it is impressive in an entirely different manner. Instead of shining with overindulgence and lavish sculptures and paintings, it reminds me somewhat of a fairy wonderland. Somewhat difficult to describe, the ceiling is made of leaves and vines and gigantic trees are all over the place. Small fountains are at the corners of the room, spilling into tiny ponds in which koi fish swim. Flowers are placed sporadically throughout the room and on top of a marble platform in the center is a pure white table and several elaborate chairs. There is no other furniture in the room.

Not like I imagined at all.

Seated at these chairs are stunningly handsome men and women, five in total. The only one I recognize is Ferrars, who is staring at me then looking away with a strange expression. As I approach them, I bow slightly, which causes them to stand in a display of respect. I don't know what I did to deserve even this, considering that they were probably going to kill me.

"Good morning, Mona," a deep voice erupts from the man closest to me. He has light chocolate skin and bright green eyes, dressed in a toga-like robe. "I am Markus."

He lifts a hand to touch the regal woman beside him. "This is Gizelda, and next to her is Cyrus, Ulysses, and Ferrars." Gizelda has olive skin and black hair, while Cyrus is exceptionally tall with pale skin and silver hair. Ulysses is slightly tanned with a long black ponytail, which contrasts with Ferrars's light hair and skin.

"Good morning," I reply, not knowing quite what to do. The short guard elbows me, and as I turn to look at him he makes a gesture with his hands. I mirror the gesture, which I realize was the one Markus made to me on my way in.

"Your conversion went splendidly well," Gizelda comments, scanning my face and body, "you are quite beautiful." Her statement feels almost like a cold assessment.

"Thank you... High One," I choke as the guard elbows me again, whispering the words.

"Sit down," Markus smiles, gesturing to a chair about ten feet from the white table. Cautiously, I travel over to it, checking for bombs or something like that before sitting in the chair.

"Her smell is simply magnificent," Ulysses comments with a smile. Ferrars says nothing, almost squirming in his seat. The other four launch into a conversation about my looks and smell. Soon the whole conversation shifted to how I would be a good asset to headquarters, mostly as a female spy.

"She would be a good mate or servant to one of the nobles," Markus notes, marking in a notepad in front of him. Ferrars looked at Markus urgently after he says this, all of the sudden invested in the conversation.

"Markus, she's mated already," he says, then suddenly stops and looks like he wants to cough what he said back into his throat. The other four completely stop and stare at him.

"And how would you know that?" Gizelda asks, raising an eyebrow. Ferrars says nothing in response.

"Mona, please show us your marking," Ulysses requests, and they all turn to stare at me. Hesitantly I show them the mark near my neck. I had covered it with facial makeup earlier, so I rub it off quickly.

"Well, that eliminates those options," Cyrus looks at the others, "we don't really have much of a choice now. I'm guessing she is mated to someone from her pack. If we exile the pack like we originally planned, she will be torn apart due to her bond."

Silence reigns in the room for a few seconds. Ulysses and Gizelda are nodding their heads in agreement. Pure dread enters me, shocking my entire body. They are going to terminate me.

"Show them your other marking, Mona," Ferrars commands, looking almost as disturbed as I am. A collective gasp rises in the room, as all the attention once again rivets towards me.

I shakily raise the corner of my shirt, revealing the small marking near my hip. "Is that really a marking, Ulysses?" Cyrus asks, "you know I can't see very well."

"Oh, it is," Ulysses remarks, staring hard at it. "Mona, when did you receive these marks? What talent are you?"

"I'm... not sure. I was not conscious for either," I reply, "and I do not have a talent."

"Surely you have a talent," Markus says, "even if it is just developing, every werewolf has one."

"She is a strange creature," Gizelda smiles rather coldly, "she seems very confused and misguided. It would be best to terminate her, no matter how much of an asset she could potentially become."

It is at this point that I begin to seriously panic.

"Please, High Ones, I am not a werewolf! You must believe me!" Tears slip like raindrops from my features, and I stand up.

They look at me for a few seconds. "She is obviously a very confused creature," Gizelda repeats slowly.

"I promise, High Ones. I was never meant to have any characteristics of a werewolf, I-"

"Bring in the rest of her pack," Gizelda orders, "maybe she will stop spouting nonsense if she sees them." The doors open again and one by one each member of the pack are led in. Danae is not among them, but it seems that they captured Ray. Yi is still nowhere to be found. I begin to cry even harder when I see Xavier's stunningly beautiful features covered in dirt and grime. His reaction is similar to my own.

"Gizelda, Mona is not speaking nonsense." The door bangs open again, and Griffin walks in. His hair glows along with his brown eyes, a smile on his features. He travels to my side, touching my shoulder once. "She is a Spier."

"Griffin, act as befitting your status," Cyrus sighs, "it is not your place to be defending her. It is obvious that she is a werewolf, and a unique one at that."

"But is it?" he responds, "she does not have super strength, eyesight, or speed. She does not possess a talent as well, and was carried over to Headquarters because she couldn't keep up. In addition, she also possesses an ability that we would regret terminating her for. She is an asset so valuable that throwing her away would be like throwing away one of you, even. Her pack has done nothing wrong."

"What is it, Griffin?" Gizelda asks impatiently, "get to the point."

"She can heal the possessed," he says triumphantly, by which point the entire council is laughing with incredulity. I am even more puzzled. How did he know that? He must have questioned Xavier or something.

"Good one, Griffin," Ferrars chuckles.

"Seriously, if you like her that much, you could have come up with something better than that," Ulysses says.

"She really can!" Xavier pleads, breaking from the line he had been forced to stay in. He walks forward, and the others do as well. "We saw it several times."

"Well, obviously you all "saw" it, considering that every one of you clearly has a great attachment to this woman," Gizelda snaps, "excuse us if we don't take your testimonies as evidence."

"Please give me a chance," I beg them, trying to smile through my tears, "I was a Seer since I was a little girl. Ray awakened me, but the conversion was going unsuccessfully so Xavier added some werewolf blood."

"So you are saying you are both werewolf and Spier?" Gizelda asks dryly. Obviously she is taking command of the conversation.

"Yes, High One." I nod my head.

"Okay, fine. Then you should be able to conjure a spirit spear for us."

Oh no. I look at Xavier, then back at the council, fear in my eyes. "I am still developing that skill." I lower my eyes.

"Then you have no proof," Markus says calmly.

We stare at each other as the council continues to converse in loud tones. "I'm doomed," I mouth to Xavier and the others. As he weakly smiles back, it is like a band-aid is ripped from an open sore, the pain swallowing me whole. It feels like everything shouldn't end this way. Like I would leave something unfinished if I was terminated now. Whether that something is mending my broken relationship with Xavier or not, I can't really tell.

"Council, do you really not remember her?" Griffin speaks up, interrupting the banter of the others. "It was only a few years ago that you considered her as a Candidate."

All movement stops in the room, even time seeming to halt.

"Surely... you don't mean that she is the one that died under your care," Gizelda boomed.

"Yes, I was assigned to her. I was there when she died in a car crash. However, I was also there when she came back to life, with eyes of bright green, crying about a dark creature that turned her father's eyes red."

I am frozen to the spot. This is a pretty fanciful tale, though a shamefully convincing one, that he is spinning.

Cyrus pounds his hands on the table as he rises to his feet in indignation. "You can't possibly tell us this now when over ten years ago you told us she was dead. You are lying to us."

"I am not lying! As your oldest and faithful son, I am not lying to you. What I speak is utter truth. Mona is the only living Candidate for the prophecy, and if you terminate her and the pack, we will all be condemned as fools for the rest of eternity."

Shock ripples through me as I realize he was the son that wasn't suitable to be the successor to the throne. All because he's a crossbreed.

"WHY did you lie to us, Griffin?" Ulysses thunders.

"Well, at the time, I thought that she deserved a life without us watching her every move. I observed that she had suffered great trauma at the hands of the Shifters, and you know that the Candidacy is affected by the Candidate's mental health. I thought our presence as well as the trauma of losing her parents would affect her for the worse. What if she caught me morphing one day? We couldn't hide from her forever. By that time I had already had some close calls. However, the most important reason why I had the courage to leave her at the orphanage and travel back to Headquarters was that I believed if she was truly the Candidate, she would somehow find her way back to us. And I was right."

"Son, I did not raise you to so blatantly lie like this," Cyrus says angrily.

"I am not lying," Griffin responds, just as frustrated.

"Griffin, either you are lying to us now, or you lied to us then. Either way that is a disgraceful act that we do not condone. However, if you are lying now, the consequences will be far worse. I must have your absolute assurance that you believe this to be true," Markus says calmly.

"I am not lying," Griffin states with such conviction that I would have believed him if he said that the world was made of marshmallows and lollipops.

"We will take your words into account," Gizelda responds, looking down at her paper. "However, we will need proof before we can be certain that Mona is a Candidate."

"Griffin, is one of the marks on Mona yours?" Ferrars asked him. Griffin's cool demeanor all but evaporates in seconds.

"Yes, I left a mark on her right before we parted ways," he replies slowly. Gizelda raises her eyebrows.

I cast a glance over at Xavier to see how he is taking this. He is literally shaking with anger, and the others are looking at him with curiosity. Ray catches my eye and shrugs.

"Which all but elevates our need to gather more evidence in order to accept this as truth," Gizelda says, "We still have not seen any of Mona's abilities as of yet-"

Suddenly everyone's nose perks up. I watch in confusion as several of the guards begin to morph. Griffin grabs my arm. "Stay by me," he whispers, "I'll protect you."

"No, I'll protect you," Xavier shows up by my side. "Get lost, crossbreed," he scathingly insults Griffin.

"Be nice," I elbow him in the side, "he may have gotten us out of being killed." No matter how much I am entertained by his jealousy, I feel like Griffin will be hurt if I don't say anything.

Both of them squeeze my arm. "Would either of you tell me what is going on?"

"No other way to describe it except that it smells like puke mixed in with blood and terror in here," Griffin wrinkles his nose, "yeah, pretty sure its a Shifter attack."

"I didn't know terror had a smell." If I wrinkle my nose enough, I can smell the hint of pure nastiness.

"Well it does. And it’s getting closer," he replies, "seems like an insane number of them too."

“How did they get in?” Markus exclaims, “we have impenetrable walls around the Headquarters!” Of course, no one answers.

All of the werewolves are looking around anxiously. "Call a Spier!" Gizelda orders. Within seconds, three or four march in. All of them look like normal human beings, none particularly pretty or ugly.

Then the fear sets in.

Claws of icy coldness dig into my chest, chilling me to the bone. I can barely think as the fear chokes me, squeezing all the life out of my body. Griffin and Xavier's presence don't help at all... all I can feel is the sorrow, hurt and pain.

Then everything is black. To me, everything is dark and gloomy. I see glimpses of the empty forests, the lonesome castles, the large oceans, and everything begins to make sense. No wonder the world is empty.

They are all coming here.

The lights flash again as I see them—big and small, skinny and large—coming by the thousands into the room. I can't breathe as they crowd the floor and walls, stuffing the room with their dark energy.

"I should have known this was going to happen," I whisper softly.

"How, Mona, how?" Xavier asks, rubbing my hand. I saw the signs. I have no excuse. And now we are all going to die here. "How many are there, Mona?"

"Too many to count," I choke, "they are everywhere... their red eyes are all staring at me." I feel dizzy, and almost faint into Xavier's arms. I cannot take their red eyes.

Gizelda looks at me, and I can feel her desperate gaze. The Shifters are vanishing into trees and fountains, making the water turn to lava and the leaves into burning coal.

The Spiers step forward and begin murmuring strange chants. To my amazed eyes, enormous spears are formed, which they then throw with incredible accuracy through dozens of Shifters. As the spear stab each one they disappear, simply ceasing to exist. However, so many more are taking their place that they seem impossible to fight all at once.

"Mona, move!" Griffin pushes me out of the way as a mass of burning, tangled vines fall where I used to stand. For some reason, the raining vines and leaves remind me of the hail that beat upon me on the day I tried to commit suicide. How can the werewolves fight against something like this? They can only kill the host of the Shifter, and if the Shifter chooses not to take a host until it is in a position that makes it impossible to kill, then there is no way to defeat them.

Maybe I have looking at this from the wrong angle this entire time. I have always thought, kill the Shifters. Create a spear, so you can kill the Shifters. It is all I have been told by the werewolves, and maybe for them there really is no other way. But I am different. An oddity. I mean, look at my crazy ability to basically extract the Shifter from the host.

I guess the real dilemma I should consider is that if I am able to heal the possessed, how would I heal the possessor from itself?

My whole line of thought snaps as I suddenly just get it. Understanding flows through my entire being... from where, I have no clue. Without a word I break away from Griffin and Xavier, both of them yelling after me in alarm.

I travel up to the platform, where the High Ones are standing. "Please," I say once, and all five of them step off the platform. I am amazed at the power and authority laced within my voice.

I climb onto the chair, and from there onto the table. It is from this vantage point that I can see them all, thousands surrounding me. I can feel their emotions of fear and hurt, of confusion and terror. It threatens to swallow me whole, for it resembles the same pain that I have been shouldering all my life.

I am not like them. I do not only consist of pain and hurt, or even the desire for revenge. I am more.

I am different.

I start to open myself to the lost souls, projecting emotions of joy and hope upon them. I can see them shrink back in retaliation... just like I would in their position. I start to see myself in every one of them. How can I possibly heal these broken souls when I am not fully mended myself?

I start to think of the warmth within my heart, letting memories overwhelm me. Faces start to appear before me... my mother, father... and a familiar werewolf with bright blue hair. A bright emotion starts to leave me, an emotion that overpowers everything else. I smile in excitement. This is what the Shifters need. Love.

My emotions form wisps of air, which all come together to form a shape. Even I don't know what it looks like because of its enormity. But I can feel it. I can sense the warmness surrounding me, filling the room with energy and light.

The Shifters stare it the shape, their red eyes boring into the light with its darkness. After a second, they all begin to enter the shape, boarding it as if they were all in line to enter a cruise and embark on a magical journey.

Amazement still overwhelms me as every last one of the Shifters enter the shape. I can feel it tugging at me, and I let go hesitantly. The shape sails away, and as it does I can see that it truly does resemble a boat, flying through the sky as if it is the ocean. It takes a few seconds after the boat disappears for me to realize what I had done.

I stumble off the table, completely drained. As I fall, I murmur, "I sent them, I sent them..."

Out of the darkness, I hear someone ask, "where did you send them?"

I answer with a weak smile on my face. "I sent them home."
.......................................

A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

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Re: A Howl In The Night - What. The. Crap.

Unread post by Fuck_Me » 09 Jan 2016 16:23

What. The. Crap.
My eyes open slowly, painfully, as if the movement itself hurts me. But it is the reality of life that I really wish to avoid.

The first thing I catch sight of after a moment of dizziness is a man with dark black hair. He is gazing at me warmly, smiling as I start to cough and sit up. "There there," he pats my hand softly, "not too fast."

"Who are you?" I ask him in the middle of my coughs.

He just looks at me, putting a large hand underneath my head. Gently he presses a switch, and the bed tilts into a sitting position. "I am Legarius," he answers me while reaching for a small cup of water. "Are you thirsty?"

My mind flashes back to the first night that I met Xavier, who had murmured the same words. Pain and loss strike as I search through the meager memories, trying to salvage the remnants of beauty that are left.

"Where's Xavier?" I ask him urgently, my heartbeat skyrocketing. Horror races through me at the recollection of the Council's words the day before. What if the entire pack is dead right now? What will I do with my shameful self?

"He is perfectly fine right now," Legarius replies as I grab his arm with a ferocity that surprises even me. "Who you should be worried about right now is yourself. Do you feel better?"

Do I? I hesitantly release Legarius's wrist and reach towards my own head. A terrible pain sweeps through me, and I groan. "It's like a migraine," I mutter, ripping my hand away. I don't need to be sick right now. I need to be helping my friends.

"It's okay though," I try to protest as Legarius reaches for a bottle of pills. "I really just need to see my pack. Please."

"Take this, and you can go see them as soon as you wake up," he assures me, holding the small yellow pill before my eyes. I look at it warily, as if it is an enemy.

"You promise?" I ask him as I take the pill and hold it in my hand. He nods, and I lift it to my lips slowly. Trying not to think about it, I hasten to throw it in my mouth, trying to swallow as quickly as possible. It barely hits my stomach before I start to notice the effects.

"Easy, princess," he laughs as I begin to see red, thrashing around like a bull in a china shop. Everything becomes dizzy again, and I moan.

"What kind of pill is this?" I berate him angrily. It is like fire in my insides, intensifying my migraine extremely. I soon find it hard to move, like I am frozen in place. He just continues to laugh as the sleepiness takes over, my eyelids slipping. I am barely conscious within seconds. I slip off into dreamland, vowing to kill Legarius as I go.



* * *



"She asked for me. Let me have a minute with her alone," a low voice argues.

"I don't know if we can let you do that. The Council never said anything about her meeting with her pack. You will have to have a consultation with them first. Just because she is off the hook doesn't mean you are."

"You heard it as plain and clear as I did. The Council gave her the power to do whatever she wants, except when she is ordered by one them. If she wants to meet with me, she can."

"I don't like this."

"You don't have to."

My eyes slip open for the second time, directed towards the source of the bickering. In the corner of my vision I spot Griffin and Xavier by the door of the hospital-like room I inhabit. They don't seem to notice me at all, arguing back and forth bitterly. Legarius is nowhere to be seen, luckily for him.

As I touch my head, I notice that the headache is gone entirely. That awful pill actually worked.

"She's awake." Xavier turns towards me, and I nearly faint at the sight. I didn't realize how much I have missed him. Griffin just looks at me angrily.

"You want to meet with him?" He asks, casting a glance with Xavier. "Surely you were just speaking out of delirium."

I sit up again, trying to figure out how to deal with this situation. Yes, I want to meet with Xavier. However, I don't want to make Griffin too mad. He saved my life, after all.

"I feel really tired," I lament, lying through my teeth, "but this hospital bed is so hard and uncomfortable."

"I'll take you to your room," Xavier says gently, coming over to my side. Griffin glares at him. "Don't you have a meeting to go to?" Xavier asks laughingly as Griffin increasingly acts like a dog ready to bite off someone's head.

"Yes, I do, actually. But I'm not leaving until I know Mona is going to be safe while I'm gone."

I reach to touch Griffin's arm. "I'll be safe. Trust me."

Still looking annoyed, he backs away, knowing he can't do much else. He can't bring me with him, after all.

"Don't hurt her," he snaps to Xavier and retreats through the open doorway. A little laugh escapes me as he angrily walks away.

Xavier walks up to me, scooping me into his arms. The warmth of his chest envelopes me, and I drink in the wonderful scent he possesses. Without a word passing between us, he carries me through the empty hallways.

When we finally reach the room I have stayed in, he crosses over to my bed and lays me down. He expectantly looks at me, and I look back, puzzled.

"Aren't you going to go to sleep?" He asks me impatiently, and I laugh.

"I only said that to get Griffin to stop nagging," I grin widely. Xavier groans, staring at me furiously.

"Mona, you make this so hard on me." His voice sounds strained as he looks away. "Just go to sleep like you said you would."

A few seconds of silence pass while I try to figure out what's wrong with him. He looks as if he is trying to restrain himself. Trying to force himself to be cold to me. His beautiful face is bent in concentration, then reducing to a stoic expression. Alarm enters my body.

He turns to go, and subconsciously I reach to grab his hand. "Please... please don't leave," I beg him.

He freezes, shivers running through both of our bodies. "Mona!" He nearly shouts in agitation, then rips away from me and almost runs to the door. He shuts it hastily, clicking the lock as well. Nervousness erupts within me as I survey his handsome form. I have never seen him look or act like this before.

He crosses back over to me, scanning my face, my body. I begin to feel even more nervous and self-conscious as I realize that not only am I clothed in a flimsy, see-through hospital gown over a tank top and shorts, but that we are totally alone. I am suddenly even more aware of him, of his attractiveness. Butterflies flutter in my stomach.

He leans over me, and my anticipation mounts. Without a word he reaches forward and takes the sleeve of the gown in his hand, ripping it off in one fluid motion. I am so scared of him right now, but at the same time, I feel heart-wrenching desire. What is wrong with me? Have I caught another cold?

Is this the desire to "bond" that I heard the werewolves talk about? For it is consuming my every thought, my every wish.

I begin to grow delirious with need as he climbs onto the bed next to me, fingering the frayed edges of the gown at the top of my shoulders. His mischievous fingers dance onto my shoulder, sending sparks of heat through my body. He touches my fading bruise, anger and an unfathomable emotion in his gaze. "Did he touch you here?" He asks, sounding even more strangled than before. It takes me a second to register what he asked.

I hesitantly nod, remembering the way Griffin kissed my arm with a guilty conscience. He tries to control himself, but loses it altogether. I stare at him as his eyes grow diluted, and then back to their normal size.

I look with wonder and confusion as he tilts his head towards my arm. An uncontainable delight consumes me as his soft lips brush against my bruise, then down my arm. How can he make me feel this way? There is no way to describe the hunger that enters me at this moment, lust arising like a tidal wave.

He rips off my other sleeve, then looks at me. I lose myself within his bright eyes, drunk on the pleasure I am now experiencing. "Did he touch you... here?" He lets one finger linger on my other arm. I nod quickly, urgently.

His kisses deepen as they cover my slender arm, and his breath begins to get even more agitated. A growl rumbles in his throat, almost like a wolf, and he holds the neck of my hospital gown and rips it. He flings it off me as if it nothing, and then his breath catches as he surveys me. "You are so beautiful," he whispers, and I am speechless. This tenderness is so intoxicating that I nearly drown within it.

His attention immediately snaps to my mating mark by my neck, and his head dips towards it. A small cry escapes me as he kisses the mark, which starts to glow and send waves of pleasure through my form.

His kisses are deepening to the point where I can barely stand it. "Please... Xavier, please," I beg, causing his eyes to light on fire. His hands are roaming over the edges of my body, and he kisses my collarbone.

With a hungry expression, he lifts the folds of my tank top, pushing it upwards so it exposed my stomach. His gaze darkens as he surveys the mark near my hip. "Did he touch you... there?" He gestures towards the mark. I just looked at him for a moment, then nodded. He immediately kisses my stomach, every one of his kisses surrounding the mark but none of them touching it. "This is the one part of you that belongs to him," he angrily states, "but nothing else will."

His hands run over my hips and his lips soon join in. There is a fire that consumes both of us, overwhelming our bodies, hearts, and reason. He is so careful with me, his caution almost annoying to me in some way. "Xavier," I whisper again, closing my eyes. When I open them again he is by my feet, holding one of my legs as he hastens to cover it in kisses. It is a wonderfully distracting feeling, but soon I am drawn to the fact that I somehow want more.

"I'm sure he touched you here," he points at each one of my toes, and casts me a glance so deep that it gives me the shivers. I'm pretty sure he didn't, but I nod anyway. Just as I expected, each one of his kisses make me yearn for more.

He stops for a minute, looking at me as he is lifting his head. I pout a little, annoyed both by the lack of kisses and by the idiot he has turned me into. I barely even recognize this side of me, this strange part of my being that aches for Xavier in ways that I don't even know of. However, I can't help myself, and I turn towards him and reach with one hand. He takes it, and suddenly he is almost on top of me before I realized he moved.

It is now that I notice his hunger that has intensified by so much since this whole thing started. He wants the same thing I want, and something tells me he knows exactly what that is.

His face is inches from mine, and both of his hands cup my face. "Did he kiss you here?" He looks at my eyes, and doesn't wait for a response as he kisses my eyelids, then my cheeks and nose. My lips burn, but he never touches them. With a smile his mouth reaches my ear and teeth nibble the edge with a gentleness that surprises me. Finally, he returns to my face, looking at my lips the same way that I'm looking at him. We are both so close... so incredibly close.

"Did he kiss you here?" We both know what he is talking about this time.

I stare at him for a minute, dazed by his closeness, and softly murmur, "no, Xavier."

"Good." He nods in satisfaction. "Then I will be the first and only one to taste this delicious part of you. To finally bond with you."

Excitement builds up as I eagerly close my eyes and tilt my face forward. His lips descend upon mine...



THUMP, THUMP!

We are both jolted out of our own world as a furious hand raps upon the heavy, soundproof doors. "Griffin," I mutter. Words can not describe how angry I feel at this moment. I feel... cheated.

"Act asleep," he whispers urgently, grabbing the fragments of my dress and throwing it in the garbage chute. He sweeps the covers over me and walks calmly to the door, opening it slowly.

Griffin is obviously furious, so I force my eyes to close and steady my breathing from a hundred miles per hour to a normal rate. "What do you want Griffin?" Xavier asks calmly.

"What did you do to her?" He yells.

"Calm down, Griffin. Don't be loud, she's sleeping."

There is silence for a minute, probably because he is trying to calm down. "Do you really have to lock the door?" He finally asks.

"Well, I'm imagine if someone like you barged in here without the door locked, she would have woken up easily. And she needs rest." His voice lowers, "Griffin, she's sleeping. How could I have done anything to her?"

"It is always folly to underestimate someone, and it certainly will be the death of me to underestimate you," he replies slowly. "Just know this. Even if she does not now, she will belong to me. And when that time comes, I would prefer it if you stayed away from her."

"If she ever does 'belong to you'," Xavier laughs, "I will do as you say."

There is silence, then loud footsteps. The door swings to a shut, and Xavier moves to my side. "I am obviously not welcome here," Xavier chuckles as he reaches my side, stroking my hair lightly.

It is time for me to stop acting like an idiot and start acting like the woman I am. I search within my brain for something to say. Something that will make him just as crazy as he makes me. Wow. This is difficult.

"You are always welcome right here," I pat the place next to me, then nearly kick myself. I am so bad at this.

Nevertheless, I still notice the hunger entering his gaze. It diminishes slightly as he laughs. "You are so funny, Mona. You make it so hard for me to resist you."

"You don't need to resist, Xavier," I whisper, looking into his eyes, "you really don't."

He stares at me for a moment, stone-faced. "Mona, that's not fair. You aren't supposed to say that."

"I can say what I want to say." I touch his face, slowly lowering it to mine as I finger one of his azure locks. My fingers dance across his face eagerly.

"I have a lot of things to teach you," he laughs, "but looks like you have already mastered how to tempt a man." He smiles again, then suddenly delves towards me. Our lips meet in a startling union that shocks me to the bone. His kiss deepens and I respond almost violently, touching his face and hair. For some reason, I cant get enough of him in these few moments, and he is calmly dealing with me as if I am a child. He is the one who eventually breaks away from me, grinning widely. I have never known of such satisfaction and pleasure in my entire life, which I guess isn't saying too much.

If I knew his kisses were this good, I would have bonded with him earlier.

"Good bye, Mona. There will be more later." He winks at me, then leaves the room quietly. For many minutes after I am still holding two fingers to my lips, completely and utterly shocked by the wonderful feelings racing through my body and the tingle of his lips still dancing upon mine.



* * *



It is time for me to appear before the Council, and I am ashamed to admit that I am frightened. I have the feeling that this is the time that they will deliver my fate. Throughout this last week, I have been allowed time to recuperate in my room, and I have not seen any of the pack members or Griffin since the last time Xavier visited me.

I am perplexed at this disease I am catching. My skin still shivers at even the thought of his name, and even today I have been shamefully dreaming about him. I feel like even the sight of him will cause me to throw myself at his feet, begging once more for his touch. I have degraded myself by thinking about a man like him in this manner. I deserve the worst of tortures for acting like the worst of women.

I have heard of them; those women who lust for a man's touch, who would die for their chosen man. They always suffer from carrying this type of sickness, although they always claim that they are better because of it. I have never understood these women and children my age who profess to truly be in love, because it seems like a troublesome emotion that everyone would do better without. Of course, except when you are trying to heal a Shifter.

And now I have been reduced to this. I feel like saying a line from old-century poetry.

It has to be because of the bonding. Why the crap did I let him kiss me?

"Woe is me!" I exclaim dramatically, falling upon the bed. After a second of recollection, I jump back to my feet as if shocked by lightning. It is true—I really do have this disease—and even a touch upon the bed that both Xavier and I were in brings a wave of emotions that I would rather forget. I feel dizzy, sinking to my knees.

"Xavier, what have you done to me..." I moan softly, putting my head in my hands. I am corrupted forever as a result of just one of Xavier's touches.

A knock on the door interrupts my regretful thinking. Straightening to my feet, I hesitantly walk over to the door. Creaking it open, I soon am confronted with Griffin's enchanting face. Guilty attraction tugs at me, although it is slightly different from the need that washes over me whenever I think of Xavier. Smiling brightly, he reaches for my hand.

"I'm here to escort you to the meeting room," he says, looking devilishly handsome in dark pants and a black button down shirt. My hand burns in his grasp as he reaches and places a delicate kiss upon it. He really is sweet. I would be better off dreaming about someone like him.

For some reason, my hand burns in a bad way, almost as if to leave a black mark on my skin that will not disappear. I frown, rubbing at the spot as we walk into the hallway.

"I'm... sorry for blowing up on Xavier while you were recovering. I'm an awful person," he says sadly. I smile in response.

"I was never mad at you," I acknowledge softly.

"I was just extremely jealous, Mona." He looks at me, eyes of worry. "I lost you once... and I don't ever want to let go again." He seems so sincere that I can't help but believe him.

"Were you completely serious about everything you said the day I met with the Council?" I ask him honestly, surprised to find that I am not even frustrated at him. I feel like I should be mad, but the emotion doesn't come as I reach for it.

"That is exactly how it happened," he answers me with a little laugh. His auburn hair glows in the light from the gigantic windows stretching from wall to wall. Silence reigns for several minutes. It feels almost awkward to me, with Griffin trying to not even look at me as I think.

"All right, we are here."

I suddenly realize that we are standing right before the big wooden doors that I had seen once before. Consumed in my thoughts, I had not even realized that we were still walking. A twinge of sadness enters me. I would have enjoyed hearing stories from when I was young. When we were together.

"We can talk about whatever you wish later," he laughs and touches my arm softly. "I'm glad you got to think for a minute." The same burn as before occurs, shocking me immensely. I don't really understand this feeling, which consists of such attraction and mild repulsion.

The guards standing by the doors push them open slowly. Fear and sadness pounds in my heart as I survey the familiar room. It is covered in vines and budding flowers—almost exactly decorated in the same way it had been before the Shifter attack—and at the same table sits the entire Council. "Come in!" a voice booms, nearly frightening me out of my skin. "We have been waiting for you."

Markus stands up immediately as I approach, offering a heart-breaking smile. He gestures to me in a way that I have come to recognize, and I mirror the movement. "Have you recovered during this last week?" he asks genially.

"Yes, High One."

The other council members look impatient as pleasantries are exchanged. "We have been heavily discussing this matter over the past few days," Gizelda speaks finally of the issue everyone is desiring to hear about, "and we decided to inform you of your current situation and of new responsibilities and privileges that will come if you choose to accept the position we offer you."

All I can think about is the word position. Position? Are they going to force me to be in their werewolf army? I picture myself in a battlefield surrounded by sweaty, unfamiliar werewolves and shudder.

"Griffin mentioned that you were a Candidate before the Shifter attack. Do you know what he meant by that statement?" she asks me. I shake my head rather fiercely.

Please don't let it be something bad. Please don't tell me anything that will give me another heart attack.

"A Candidate is our term used to describe someone who is eligible to complete the prophecy that defines our existence. The prophecy has no name because of its vast importance to our race."

"I have read it before," I say, "although I didn't make much sense out of it."

"As you know, werewolves have a very keen sense of smell. They are even able to detect emotions and some can even read thoughts through the scents of others. In this way, we are able to detect a Candidate. At your birth, and the birth of several others like you, you released a smell that every single werewolf recognizes, though even we cannot describe it. It is such a compelling and powerful aroma that we are instantly able to locate the baby from hundreds of miles away. However, this aroma vanishes within a few hours, and we lose track of the boy or girl if we do not have a werewolf trailing them. Usually the Shifters somehow kill them before they reach adolescent years, despite the protection we offer. Your Guardian, of course, was Griffin." Gizelda casts a slightly sickening glance at Griffin as he stands beside me. "And in case you were wondering, he wasn't supposed to mate with you. That's not normal for a Candidate and Guardian relationship."

Griffin blushes and shrugs helplessly as a tiny giggle escapes me.

"Several years ago, you were reported to be dead by Griffin, and therefore eluded our supervision for the rest of your childhood. We do not know all of the details, but your pack member with the blue hair told us he found you in the forest a few months ago. We are also led to believe that you displayed your powers to Pack 101 while in their company, correct?"

I nod slowly. This is confusing me.

"Your extraordinary power to control the shifters, even drawing them out of humans, has proven you to be the one special Candidate we have been looking for. Before now, such an ability was unheard of. The prophecy is very vague on this matter, but we see the truth very clearly, especially after the display you put on a week ago. You are not only the last living Candidate we know of, but the Chosen One."

"Chosen One? Is that my position?" I ask in alarm. What does a Chosen One do? Does the Chosen One have to lead an army?

Griffin notices my fear and laughs, slightly brushing against my arm. Sparks fly throughout my body.

"Not so fast," Cyrus laughs, "we have a proposition for you."

My heart races so fast I feel like it is going to explode. Strands of bright red hair fall into my eyes, but I am so frozen in place that I can't even brush them away.

"We invite you to live here, at Headquarters," Cyrus begins, "Where you will be given anything you ever desire. You will be able to learn how to master your skills under our extremely talented instructors, how to become so powerful that you are unstoppable, and most importantly, how to truly become one of us."

There is a pause for a minute while I try to register what he said. When realization hits me, I nearly fall to the floor. Did they say anything about an army? Because it sounds a lot like they want me to undertake military training. I'm really not good at that stuff.

"This is only the tip of the iceberg," Markus adds quickly after he notices my extremely pale face.

"In addition to these things, we would normally offer you the highly sought-after rank of being the heir to the throne's partner, but seeing that you have... complicated circumstances surrounding your mating, we thought it would be better to offer you something slightly different."

Please don't grant me leadership of a werewolf army.

"If you decide to stay, we will allow you to have Griffin as a partner and he shall obtain the rank of heir to the throne. We will also be willing to conduct a ritual known as Sharuken, which is a long and difficult process that will allow you to be freed of your second mating. We have used it only once before, but we are confident in its abilities to release you from all attraction, bonds, and any feelings of love you may hold towards your mate."

"WHAT?" Ferrars roars, jumping to his feet in anger. Griffin just looks at Cyrus in confusion.

But the thing that startles me the most is not the same thing that Ferrars and Griffin are surprised about. All of that other stuff has not even crossed my mind yet.

The dizziness expands to encompass my entire vision. I stumble and trip on air and hurtle towards the floor. This is not happening. They did not just say they could release me from him. That I could be freed from this awful, terrible disease.

I fight to escape reality once more as my head hits a hard surface, and succeed as the pain shocks me into unconsciousness.

The last thing that crosses my mind is the word free.


.......................................

A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

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Re: A Howl In The Night -To Be or Not To Be... That is the Q

Unread post by Fuck_Me » 09 Jan 2016 16:27

To Be or Not To Be... That is the Question
I have never been good at making decisions. Especially important ones. Especially ones that have the potential to end the entire existence of either the werewolf or Shifter race.

"Mona, dear, you seem to be swooning on us whenever you come in this room." A pearly, magical laugh travels towards my ears. Two guards hasten to my side, and although my eyes are closed, I can sense their heavy footsteps.

It is Griffin who gets to me first, his cold hands touching my arms lightly, and then brushing across my forehead. At first his touch is icy, then filled with a heat that brands me like an iron. A scream echoes through the room, and it takes a moment for me to realize that it is mine.

Each touch seems to be getting worse. I don’t remember it hurting this bad before.

My eyes fly open and the first thing I see is Griffin's face, twisted with worry. "What is wrong, Mona?" he asks me softly.

I say nothing, reaching with one slender arm to touch my forehead. It burns. It burns like nothing I have ever felt before. A small cry escapes me.

"Is it your forehead? What are you feeling?" His beautiful brown eyes search me anxiously, peering somehow into the depths of my soul. His hand reaches up and alarm immediately enters my body. My arm suddenly is pushing him away, tears flowing from my face. What is this agony?

Griffin draws back in surprise, hurt in his eyes. I feel so disappointed. So guilty as he turns away.

"Please..." Stars are dancing before my eyes as I struggle to my feet. The two guards steady me as I start to wobble. "I'm f-fine. Where a-am I? What is-"

"Do you not remember anything?" Markus questions. I shake my head in response.

"Sorry, it is just..." Memories are swirling within my head. I grab my temples when I find that a hole seems to exist within my memories, a hole that somehow seems to correlate with the spot where Griffin touched me. I angrily grasp for it back, and faded wisps start to return. It takes a minute for me to finally recover everything that had happened. "Free," I murmur, falling back into a chair that the guards had retrieved.

"Sharuken seems to give you quite the shock," Gizelda comments, "I know it is an experimental procedure, but we feel quite confident that it will deliver the desired results."

Random thoughts are distracting me, making it difficult for me to listen to the Council. Xavier's face keeps appearing before me, his green eyes staring into my soul. I try to think of what he would tell me right now, and the imaginary Xavier's expression morphs into a face of pure despair.

Xavier melts my heart with one look as he begs, my mind flashing to that one night at the hotel. "Just please, let us be anything but this! You can treat me like dirt, or a child, for anything from you is better than nothing at all. I can be a plaything to you if you wish, as long as I am something!"

"Please... don't do this to me!"

I nearly fall off the chair when I realize that I accidentally spoke the last plea aloud. It is as if I am finally returning to reality, only now remembering that I am with the Council and they can hear my every word. Subconsciously I clutch my head in my hands and start to cry. I can't get rid of the mental image of Xavier's face as he asks for forgiveness.

"Pardon me?" Gizelda asks with a clear tone of disapproval.

"I... I, I..." I struggle to regain my senses. "I cannot follow through with the procedure, High One."

Griffin turns to stare at me, icily surveying my discomfort. "And why is that?" he asks so softly that I barely realize he is actually speaking. I turn a deep shade of scarlet red. This is it. This is crunch time.

"I just... can't," I mumble, looking away from Griffin. Away from everyone.

This disease is destroying me. Even now I am lusting for Xavier's touch, and honestly, it feels like I would die without it. I just know I can't go through the procedure with a condition like this.

After a shocked silence, Cyrus narrows his eyes. I glance at him warily. "We understand you have some feelings for your past mate," he begins, "and we regret that you have fallen into such a predicament. Such a situation would not be wished upon anyone... especially any of our own. However, you must understand that upon your shoulders rests the destiny of the werewolf race. You are so crucial to our mission... our purpose as werewolves. This is why it is so important that you accept our offer. We are not acting in our own best interest, but in the best interest of our entire race."

"We implore you to consider our offer," Markus speaks firmly.

Griffin steps closer to me, though his eyes are on the Council. "She needs time. Allow her some time to think." He speaks with the regal authority of a king, but I can tell he is nervous.

Ferrars looks slightly relieved, most likely at the chance that he may keep his current position. "She does need time. I agree," he says quickly.

The Council discuss among themselves whether to allow me more time. I try not to overhear them, although it is difficult not to. Seriously. I am about to have a temper tantrum. If they don't give me any time...

"We will deliver an ultimatum tomorrow at noon," Cyrus finally says, his words nearly scaring me out of my skin. "You may leave now."

So now I have less than a day to decide whether to help the werewolf race and lose Xavier in the process or abandon it entirely. Certainly seems like a lose-lose situation.

I can only wonder what Xavier's real reaction would be if he was here. And I also can't help but ask myself why I care so much.

Griffin touches the small of my back with his hand, and it doesn't hurt because of the layer of cloth. I breathe a sigh of relief. I hate that I feel like this, but there is not much I can do. I had no clue that this bond between Xavier and I would become such a curse.

He tentatively leads me outside of the meeting room, acting as if I was made of glass. “What’s wrong with you?” he asks angrily, as soon as we leave the room. His face is twisted in anger and confusion. I stare back at him with the same expression.

He glares at me, then turns away briefly. When he looks back, he is somewhat subdued. More like the Griffin… the Scotty I know.

“I don’t know…” I guiltily glance at him, then at my outstretched hands. Whipping my head around, I search for anyone, anyone besides Griffin.

As a guard leaves the meeting room, I pounce. Running to him, I place one hand on his. He jumps away as if I set him on fire. “I’m sorry, Chosen One! Did I offend you?” He asks in anguish, caressing his hand and kneeling before me.

My hand doesn’t burn in the slightest, and I stare at it in curiosity. In fact, a warm tingle spreads through my body and makes me smile.

“Mona. It’s Mona.” I bend beside him, looking into his emerald green eyes. “Did my touch hurt you?” I feel sorry for him because of the shock and alarm I can detect in his eyes.

“No, Chosen One,” he responds softly, “but nobles never touch me. I’m sorry for acting in a detestable manner.”

“I’m not a noble. And I am Mona! I don’t want you to call me by any other name! And stop apologizing!” I hate to see such a handsome guy kneel before me in such a manner. I don’t deserve this measure of respect.

“I apologize.” He bows his head, and then tentatively rises to his feet. He disappears within seconds, narrowly managing to avoid my anger. He completely ignored me.

Forgetting about the guard within seconds, I turn back to Griffin, ashen with the realization that it is only him.

“It is only your touch I cannot bear,” I whisper, staring up into his eyes. He looks back in horror.

“What can you possibly mean by that?” He asks, subconsciously reaching towards my arm. I snap it away, ashamedly glancing at the ground. I can’t tell him. I can’t tell him of this awful disease that has robbed my every desire, hope, and stray thought.

I say nothing, guiltily looking around me. After a second of hopeless deliberation, my thoughts turn to the one who started all this. The one that made me look like an idiot in the meeting room.

“I have to see him. I have to talk to him.” I shake my head, and then deliberately turn away from Griffin for the millionth time. “I’ll find that guard. He will tell me where he is.”

“Where who is?” Griffin asks, his voice escalating in anger, “Mona, you better tell me right now who you are talking about!” He stalks after me as I travel in the direction of some nearby guards.

It is then that I realize that surely… surely Griffin would know. I stop and look into his brown eyes pleadingly.

“Please, Griffin, please… take me to Xavier.” His eyes seem to light on fire when he hears me, and he seems to snarl underneath his breath.

“So it is really all about him, isn’t it?” He asks sarcastically. “You can’t even touch me, but you moan about him constantly? What has he done that I haven’t? I have protected you from day one-“

“No, Griffin! You don’t understand!”

Well neither do I, but that is beside the point.

“Well then, enlighten me.” He crosses his arms over his chest. His eyes drill holes through mine. I’m not getting out of this one.

Tears start to fall from my eyes. “It’s the… it’s the…”

He softens as he watches my meltdown for a few seconds. “What is it, sweetheart?”

The endearment stings as I start to fall before him. He catches me on the way down, touching my arm and waist. Instantly I burn as if on fire, screaming loudly. He shifts his hands so that a layer of cloth separates us instantly, and the relief slowly comes. I cannot control the sobs, no matter how hard I try.

He holds me for a while, and I temporarily forget myself in his embrace. I forget about my tainted body, my horrible afflictions. It feels like I have almost regained a missing piece of myself.

But of course, it only lasts for a moment.

“I’m cursed, Griffin,” I whisper, staring blankly upwards. “I… need to talk to Xavier about the curse.”

“But Mona… didn’t you hear?” He asks quietly, steadying me.

“Hear what?”

Silence enters the room for a few seconds while Griffin seems to ponder exactly how to phrase his next words.

“He’s gone.”



~ Xavier ~



I pace the room, worry creasing my brow. “What am I supposed to do, Ray?” I ask a figure huddling in the corner of the room. The bundle of fur shakes its head, and then wearily turns to lie on the cold floor.

It has been two long days since I have seen Mona, and each second has been like an eternity. If I think really hard, I can still remember her lips upon mine. It feels so good for a minute, but then I remember that I am never going to see her again.

The second Mona stepped upon the table to send the shifters away… I knew that the Council would never give her back. Maybe Mona didn’t notice, but I saw the glimmer of excitement in Cyrus’s face. He is such a sly old dog… wanting to get his dirty paws on the only good thing that happened to the werewolf race in hundreds of years. The others had a similar expression, but none compared to his.

I want to pitch a fit about “finding her first” and all that, but turns out I didn’t even do that. Some guy beat me to the punch and I didn’t even know it. In addition, he stole her heart as easily as it took me to fall in love with her. Although I guess her heart didn’t belong to me anyway. It sure changes things, looking at the situation like this. I never thought myself to be a thief, but turns out I’m in jail for a reason, if not the one they put me in here for.

I finger the bars of the cell, made out of a strange metal that cannot be bent by werewolves. Trust me, I tried. We are not getting out of this place without help from the outside.

What I really hate about being locked in here is that I’m truly helpless. It makes me think of all the other times when I have been like this. The list stretches on and on, though most recently Mona’s awakening stirred a similar reaction in my chest. It really hurts… not being able to save the people I love.

Does Mona really need saving? I sit down, placing my head in my hands in frustration. I suppose she is safe here. More than she ever was with me. It seems like every time she was near me she would land in a near death experience.

Griffin looks like a more capable guy than I am, although I would like to think of myself as more handsome. Of course, it isn’t true, and we couldn’t be any more different. He looks more humanlike than I, without the green eyes and crazy hair. I can only hope Mona finds my bizarre looks more appealing. This is probably all I have left, if even that, over Griffin.

“Ray, seriously, help me.” I look back at the furry bundle, and it moves slightly to bare its teeth. I give him an exasperated look, and he shifts into his beast form.

“What do you want?!” He looks at me in frustration. “You know there is nothing either of us can do.” His body continues to change into a human form, and I temporarily freeze to watch him. His curious method of shifting always manages to amaze me. He is the only werewolf I know of that can stop halfway between werewolf and human for a prolonged period of time. The incredible control he has fits in perfectly with his Beast talent. Usually Beast talents lose control over themselves when they shift, but Ray never loses his temper without a reason.

“I need a plan. A plan that can get us out of this cell.” I start to pace back and forth along the bars. “I need to save Mona.”

“You aren’t getting Mona back,” Jake shrugs, lounging in another corner of the cell. “You know that. Just give up.” He looks more worn out than the rest of us, with bags underneath his eyes and a dreary glare. He has also been the one most active in trying to think up a plan with me. I know he is pretty fond of Mona and loathes losing her like I do, but seems like he has finally faced the awful facts.

“Come on, Xavier, we both know brainstorming is not going to work very well. We have tried it for about a day and a half and my head is about to explode,” Wes complains, lying on a wooden bench. I think we are all pretty much sick of each other by now.

“I’m not asking you. We all know you aren’t much help,” I snap back, leaning my head against the bars. The golden airhead in our group certainly fits the blond jokes we throw at him every now and then.

Ever since bonding, I at least gather satisfaction from the fact that she will feel some measure of regret if she casts me away. It hurts that it is turning out like this, but a sadistic part of me is happy that she now fully belongs to me. The Council can’t separate our bond. All I need to do is somehow convince Mona that she needs me, and perhaps she can somehow convince the Council to let me stay with her.

That plan may be harder than I thought to achieve, considering that I am stuck down in the dungeon. It isn’t that bad of a place, our cell having four beds and a decent bathroom. The floor and walls seems to be made of solid rock and the room is decorated sparsely. It reminds me of the hotel we stayed at, except the doors have bars.

“Ray, what have you been doing?” Jake asks Ray while he surveys a small hole in the wall. “Have you been trying to drill through the walls?”

“You have any better suggestions?” He asks in response, and then shows all of us a thin, sharp nail. “I found this stuck in the wall yesterday.”

“Like that will do any good,” I mutter, falling onto my hard bed and staring at the ceiling. I miss her. I miss her more than I would ever be willing to admit.

“Hey, I did manage to make a few holes in the wall,” Ray protests, showing us the dot-sized pinpricks scattered in one brick. “I was hoping to loosen this brick and then work my way back. Surely we could get to the wall from here and then fight our way out.”

I narrow my eyes at the holes. “That doesn’t even look like it goes through the entire brick. You may have made it halfway.”

“I’m working on it!” he huffs, and I laugh.

“How long are you planning on doing that? A year?” Wes jokingly asks. Ray blushes, although it is hard to tell because he is shifting at the same time. Obviously he is done talking to us.

Ray, now a gigantic wolf, continues to hold the nail in his teeth and push it into the rock. I turn my head away from him in hopelessness. We are doomed.

Once I think about it, technically this is all Ray’s fault. If he hadn’t Awakened her, we never would have gotten in this mess. Too delirious and angry to second guess myself, I launch into a series of thoughts and accusations against Ray in my mind. I have nothing better to do.

Just when I wonder how exactly I am going to murder Ray when we get out of here, a pair of footsteps interrupts my gleeful thinking. Intrigued, I turn to the man coming towards the bars. It doesn’t take long for me to turn back away in disgust.

Griffin doesn’t smile as he steps up to the bars, inches from my face. As I try to stay calm, I notice that today he looks like a pheonix—bright with the emotion of either fury or excitement—with his red hair and animated expression.

“What are you doing here?” Jake asks resignedly after I refuse to address Griffin. “Come here to gloat?”

“Well, I was supposed to come down here to inform you all that you will be either exiled or exterminated this Saturday, but I’m sure that is a little bit depressing for all of you at the moment… so I will try to start out with some good news.”

We all look at him dryly as he makes a big show out of trying to think of something.

“Yeah, yeah we get it,” I huff, “nothing good for us delinquents. I mean, we only found the human destined to save our entire werewolf race and basically delivered her into your greedy hands.”

“Now, now, not so fast.” He laughs, “You seem to forget that you actually were trying to keep her away from us when we caught you.”

“Only because we were afraid of something like this happening to us.”

“Look, don’t get angry at me. I’m only the messenger,” he cautions, taking a step back from the bars as my face grows red. “It’s Mona. It’s all because of her. You can blame her for all the problems you get into from now on.”

“You know I can’t do that,” I shake my head, looking at the floor. Somewhat subduing myself, I look up at him. “What do you stand to gain from all this?”

“Well, the Council says they will give me back my birthright if Mona agrees to stay at headquarters. As if she has a choice.” He pauses, looking right into my eyes. “But I don’t care about that. That is not what’s important to me.”

“What is important to you, Griffin?” All four of us nail him with an iron gaze. He seems to be growing a bit uncomfortable, squirming slightly.

“Her,” he nearly chokes, before straightening and trying to eye us coldly. “Everything about her… I want to myself. I do have selfish motives, but are they truly different from yours? All I want is to protect her and love her as a mate should.”

He is right. I am really no different than him. Why am I acting all high and mighty?

He steps closer to the bars, closer to my face. “Xavier, I don’t hate you. I’m actually grateful to you for the love and kindness you gave her, because even though she doesn’t admit it, she has certainly been affected for the better. You also saved her life several times, from what I have heard, and that makes me respect you more than anyone else at Headquarters. I know you’re a good guy. Maybe a little resentful… but I would be too in your position. Please believe me… try to understand.”

“Then surely, if you really felt that way, you would get us out of here,” I say, basically flabbergasted by his confession. It certainly seemed like he hated me.

The strangest thing of all is that I do understand. Though I don’t want to.

“Well, that is an interesting point. Why don’t I get you out of here?” He laughs. “If only it were that simple.”

“Sometimes, it is.”

“First off, I don’t have the power to let you go. Secondly, even if I did let you go, I would be worried that you would go off and do something stupid. Just out of curiosity, what would you do if I got you out?”

“Save Mona,” I say fiercely. I don’t like playing games.

“Yeah… right. See, that qualifies as something stupid. It isn’t in my best interest for you to do that, and once you think about it, it isn’t in yours either. What are you going to do when you save Mona?”

“Don’t tell me what’s in my best interest or not,” I growl, and he takes another step back.

“Answer the question, Xavier. Don’t be difficult.”

“I suppose, run from you. And the rest of the Council.” I don’t really know what I would do. That’s a thought provoking question, which brings me back to the central question I asked myself a few minutes before. I start to drown in my doubt, struggling to stay above the water.

“You know you can’t run for long. And inwardly, you know Mona is safer here than she ever was with you.”

I feel as if I have been kicked in the gut. I want to shout at Griffin for saying such lies, but then I remember that I basically admitted the same things to myself earlier. I’m not stupid, no matter how obstinate I want to remain at this point.

“You know, we haven’t even addressed Mona’s feelings here,” he says slowly, carefully. “I never planned to get into this big discussion with you, but while we are here, might as well cover the most important issue here as well.”

“I love her. And I know she feels at least a little love towards me in return.”

“I know you do. But the problem here is not what you think.” He nods his head slightly, “she holds too much affection for you. You may have been better off if she hated your guts.”

My hands grip the bars, holding them so tightly that my knuckles turn stark white. “What do you mean by that?”

“The Council is not going to let you live, you know. They absolutely cannot allow you to be with Mona. And this only makes things harder for her.”

“How come?!”

“They need someone they can control, Xavier, and you are a very strong werewolf who has bended the rules time and time again without reaping the consequences. They are afraid of an uprising. If you were allowed to be with Mona, members of our community would start to look up to you, not the Council. That was the first thing they realized while discussing this issue, for their minds are all focused on power. They wish to keep their power at any cost.”

I am nearly frozen with shock. I never thought myself to be a threat to the Council. In fact, I never meant to break any of the rules in the first place. How could they possibly think I was trying to… hoard Mona for some kind of rebellion?

“I’m easier to control,” Griffin says softly, looking at his feet. “I’m a shameful crossbreed who happens to be born in a position of power. They can rip away my status and give it back to me on a silver platter. I can’t be much more of a puppet than I am now. Even my father thinks of me only as a tool to be used.”

Yes. You do have a nice sob story. I get it. You are so unfortunate to be stuck with Mona. It is really quite a shame.

“But what about Mona, Griffin?” I ask in frustration. “Why is it harder for her?”

“Well, think about it. The Council is faced with quite the dilemma here. They can’t just pry you two apart, because they know Mona will be seriously messed up as a result. They can’t keep you two together, because of the reasons I mentioned earlier. It helps matters a little bit because I am also her mate, but doesn’t eliminate the issue by far. She obviously likes you very much and makes this problem impossible to ignore. If only they had a way to make Mona forget all about you, to forget this whole escapade with your pack so she and I can be together…”

“No.” Jake instantly says, snapping up from his seat. “They won’t.”

“They can’t.” Wes protests almost in unison. Everyone turns to me to see my own reaction.

“Sharuken?” I ask, my whole body trembling. They wouldn’t dare.

“They will… with or without Mona’s permission. They are making it seem like she has a choice, but she really doesn’t.”

I am about to explode with anger. They seriously are not going to do this to me. To us.

“But anyway, we are getting off topic. What I wanted to tell you was that you need to accept it and move on. It will make everything better for the two of you. Just try to forget about each other.”

“That’s impossible! You know I-“

“I know. I probably understand you more than anyone.” Griffin looks straight at me, stepping so close that I can feel each strained breath. “I hate this. I hate having to say this to you.”

Silence echoes through the hall as I stare at him in disbelief.

“Maybe, if you wish, the Council could perform the ritual upon you as well-“

“No. No. I couldn’t,” I fiercely turn away, “I… never want to forget her.”

“That’s what I thought,” Griffin smiles slightly, almost wistfully, in satisfaction. “I like you, Xavier. You are the sort of wolf I aspire to be like.”

“I don’t like you.” I snap, though inwardly wondering at the lack of arrogance on his face. He won. He gets her for the rest of eternity. How come he is acting so nice to me?

“Try to think of it this way. The Council consists of arrogant, greedy werewolves, but they do have some basis in morality. Mona isn’t going to live a life of servitude. She will have all the riches she could ever desire, as well as extraordinary honors and privileges. In addition, she will be trained in her Spier abilities to fulfill the prophecy and our race’s destiny. What more could you want for her?”

“Happiness. I wish for her to be happy.”

“I’ll do my best. I can’t guarantee that she will be, but I promise I will try to make her the happiest woman in the world.” All of us almost laugh at Griffin’s expression, full of intensity and fervor.

“If you can make her happy, by all means… do it,” I choke softly, my face twisted with hidden mirth. He glares at me, obviously noticing our barely-hidden chuckles.

Mona? Happy? What a joke. It’s impossible. She isn’t exactly easy to please, to say the least.

“Well,” he looks at his watch awkwardly, “Looks like I’m needed in a few minutes in the meeting room. I’ll come back later and tell you the verdict. They are trying to decide what their final proposition to Mona will be.”

I watch him start to walk away with a resignation that shocks me. Everything he said makes perfect sense. There is really no point in trying to save Mona.

Griffin stops for a second, and then swivels around to face me. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, then quickly retreats up the narrow stairs at the end of the hallway.

Why did things have to end up like this? Now even a cowardly crossbreed is feeling… pity towards me. I feel like the lowest of werewolves—a criminal. Now that my fighting spirit has been sucked away, nothing is left except a big, gaping hole in my heart.

“Hey, I finished another hole!” Ray shouts, showing us proudly the new dot he had made. I shake my head in dismay.

“Xavier, what are you going to do?” Jake asks me in low tones, the serious one of the bunch. He calmly takes in my misshapen appearance as a tear starts to fall slowly from my eye. Embarrassed, I brush it away.

“I don’t know, Jake. I just don’t know anymore.”

“Mona seems to be getting along pretty well with Griffin,” Ray comments obnoxiously. The others start to glare at him but he doesn’t notice, delirious from the long hours in a dark cell. “She seems like she will be fine here.”

“Seems so.” I reluctantly admit, though anger is building within me. Ray is really getting on my nerves today. He always knows the best ways in which to annoy me.

“He seems to act like a real mate. Someone who is responsible and caring. I think you can rest easy, Xavier.”

“And I wasn’t?!” I exclaim, starting to shift into my wolf form. Wes and Jake start to laugh, for reasons unknown. This has happened so many times today.

“Uh… do I have to answer that?”

I pounce on him mid-shift, biting his ear and clawing his fur. He yowls in pain as I start to draw blood. We growl at each other as he rips away and completes the shift, now a wolf that is larger than I.

The fight continues for several minutes, mostly consisting of risky moves and stupid decisions. I knew I shouldn’t have gone for his tail, and I did it anyway, leaving my back open for attack. I really need to brush up on fighting tactics in this form.

“Guys…” A familiar voice interrupts our tussle, and we instantly stop. A slinky form materializes outside of the cell, leaning against the back wall.

“Yi!” we basically shout in unison. He looks around anxiously then turns back to us with one finger on his lips.

“I’m here to bust you guys out of this cell. Danae’s posing as one of the maids here at headquarters but it won’t last for long. She is getting so many wrinkles that she needs a trip to the laundromat.”

“Where have you been?” I ask him, completely shifted back to human form. He smiles and winks.

“They never captured me at the mansion. Seems that they forgot I even belonged to the pack. Funny how much a Stealth talent can manage, huh?”

“How did you get in here?” Jake queries.

“The front door,” he winks, “It is the greatest experience, walking around and not even having one cute girl wink at me. So liberating.”

“I still don’t get how you did it. That’s impossible. They must have noticed you.”

“Details, details. We will get to them later.” Yi yawns, and then pulls out a slender key. “I got this from the red-head that just left.”

“Griffin? So you have been in here the whole time?” I ask in annoyance, “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“How much fun would that be? And it’s only been a few minutes. He walked out, I walked in. And he had his key dangling from his belt loop as if he wanted it to be stolen. I could have sworn I saw him grin on the way out.”

That sly dog—quite literally. I can’t help but like him now, no matter how aggravated I am at my present situation.

“So like Jake asked, what are you going to do?” Yi asks me slowly. “Are you going to stay here and try to save Mona? Or are you going to leave with the rest of us?”

“Wait. All of you are going to leave?” I turn and look at the other pack members. They all make weird expressions that I can’t possibly decipher.

“We want to support you Xavier. But we all think it is a lost cause… a lost cause that is going to get us all killed. Griffin explained the situation pretty well.” Jake explains. He looks guilty… as he should.

“I just can’t,” I whisper, “I can’t give up on her.”

I remain silent while Yi glides over to the door, placing a key in the lock. There is a click as it turns, and the bars are finally open. I am finally free.

“You have a choice. You can either come with us now, or you can stay here and fight for her. But I promise you… if we leave, we are not coming back. This is your one and only chance.”

Everyone stands and starts to exit the cell. Yi, however, comes in and sits by me on the wooden bench. He tries his best to look comforting, and fails miserably.

“I saw Mona in her room. She looked happy. I really do hate this for you, Xavier, but we will help in any way we can. If you truly want to fight, I’m sure we can convince the others to try.”

I am barely listening to Yi, immersed in a tidal wave of memories; Mona’s smiling face after I saved her in the forest, her adorable expression of annoyance that I had come to know so well… her look of pure elation after the first kiss we shared. I can’t bear this. I can’t lose her.

Mona grins at me as I give her steak. She yells at me in indignation after I kiss her cheek. And somewhere, in the back of my mind, she sleeps in Rays arms, soaking wet in a large fountain.

That’s right… I almost forgot about that incident. I was so keen on getting her back, so eager to get on her good side that the reason why I got mad at her slipped my mind. Even though I am not mad at her in the slightest now, the main message hits me like one of Ray’s punches in the stomach.

She doesn’t need you. She doesn’t need you like you need her.

This is the final straw. I sever the last remaining bond with my emotions and stand up like a robot. I have no hard feelings towards her, but I have to let her go.

She was never mine to begin with.

No wonder she never felt the attachment I did. No wonder she never loved me in return. Even though Griffin said otherwise.

She was never mine.

The last tear I plan on shedding in a long time escapes my eye as I firmly take the first step outside of the cell door. It is over… forever.

I only wish I could say good bye.



~ Mona ~



I stare at Griffin in disbelief. “What?”

“He’s gone. He disappeared from his cell a few days ago. We have been trying to find him and the rest of his pack, but they are nowhere to be found. Yi, your friend, is a very clever Stealth talent. He must have helped them escape.” He sees my tears before they start to fall and pulls me close. “I’m sorry Mona. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this. You don’t deserve it.”

“I wanted to talk to him.” I say, still frozen by the news Griffin delivered. “I wanted to see him again.”

“I know you did.” He squeezes me tight, though careful to avoid touching my skin. The true impact of his words seems to hit me at this moment.

He left me.

He abandoned me.

Pain blossoms in my chest, swallowing me entirely. Am I even a person anymore? What am I? All I can see is pain… hurt, sorrow, and betrayal.

I should have run after him when he tried to leave last week. I should have held on to him and never let him go. And now he’s... gone. Leaving me with this awful disease that makes me feel such desire.

I am choking from lack of air, for it feels like he has taken away my willingness to breathe along with my heart. It is strange to think—that he has stolen my heart—but in this state of insanity it is easier to believe.

All I really know right now is that I need him, for reasons that are unclear. I need him like no one else I have ever met before.

I hate this feeling of dependence, but it overtakes my body until it is impossible to deny. And now I can never see him again... feel his warm lips, or hear his musical laugh. I miss it all, every single obnoxious, insolent part of him that makes him so special.

This pain.

“Please help me,” I start to sob, hanging onto Griffin like I am never going to let go. I accidentally make contact with his skin, and the pain causes me to rip apart from him. I stumble across the floor, holding my arm where I had touched Griffin. A large red mark stretches across it.

I can’t deal with this anymore.

I try to wait until the pain subsides, wait until I gain some semblance of sanity. “I will do it.” I choke, softly spitting out the cursed words. How I wish I didn’t have to say them… but I must escape.

“Do what?” Griffin gently asks, his voice full of concern. It seems to be the tone of voice he always uses with me lately.

“Anything. Anything that gets rid of the pain. Sharuken, I think they called it.”

“Mona, are you sure?”

I lean on the stone wall, not quite sure what is happening. I think the Council has gathered around me from the sound of the heavy cloaks that are swishing across the floor. I know this is it. I can’t take my words back.

I think of Xavier, of the happy times we experienced together. Of the joyous feelings in my heart that I have anxiously tried to suppress. It all means so much to me. I don’t want to lose it.

But, I don’t want to experience this. Nothing amounts to the anguish of having a heart ripped apart and left in pieces. I… don’t want to be hurt in this manner. I must become stronger.

“Yes.”


.......................................

A woman is like a tea bag - you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.

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